Hearts + Minds

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Coping with viral fear: lockdown number 3

Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

Here we are again, third lockdown, this one more serious than the rest. I don’t know about you, but my anxiety was at its highest over the holidays and into January. What a relief we are now in February!

Maybe it was that even spending time, good time, needed time, with loved ones within the restrictions still felt like a huge risk. We all took precautions and kept to ourselves prior to coming together, but with so little knowledge and rising numbers, it still felt dangerous. 

The fear was palpable: “what if, unknowingly, I bring something in that hurts those I love”? 

This fear can show up in a multitude of ways, but in the end, no matter how it shows up, it becomes a thief. It robs us of precious time because it holds us back and constricts us, and even worse, it is contagious. Our fear affects everyone around us.

The reality is that some people are dealing with the very real scenario right now that they unknowingly carried the virus to loved ones during the holiday season. And in fairness to all of them, it was a perfect storm -- coming out of a lockdown with good numbers, news of a guaranteed vaccine on the way, and easing up of restrictions to celebrate Christmas. This gave some of us an overconfidence that the worst was behind us. 

Others continued to batten down the hatches.

Coping at Christmas

No matter how you chose to spend your Christmas -- and I know some that spent it all alone for the first time ever -- you had to process what was going on around you and find a way to create a celebration that felt comfortable to you and your loved ones.

How did you cope?

Maybe like me, you saw the effect your fear had on others, and knew that you had to do something about it. I had to do a lot of self-talk, talking myself down. Or even talking to a friend about the reality of my fears, because they feel so real. Sometimes just speaking the fear aloud with someone you trust, who is in a good place mentally at the time, helps to sort out the true worries from the fanciful fears. 

You can hear what is real. But you can also understand what is taking the current situation and running with it to crazy worst-case scenarios. If you live life constantly looking at the worst-case scenarios, very often you miss out on the joy that is right in front of you.

Another tool that can work wonders is Gratitude. And I know you hear about it all the time, so it can sound like a platitude, but truly being grateful, actively, can help bring you back to the present moment, and to the love and joy that surrounds you. 

Gratitude just might be one of the antidotes to fear.

Coming out of anxiety

As the days go on, and we move further into this lockdown, I still find myself in a state of dissatisfaction, but I have finally been able to release some of that anxiety that had been gripping me. 

And it really isn’t until it starts to lift that you can see it more clearly for what it was - fear, just fear.

Fear of the unknown, fear of the ‘could haves’ and the ‘might be’s.’ I had to really challenge myself to get out of the house to go for walks. And there were errands that had to be done that took me out of my comfort zone. These small steps, all coupled together with the commitment to stay home and stay safe released something in me. And last week I even got to the point where we were able to go back to our local coffee shop for take-aways. It felt good to be supporting a local business in person again. 

Yes, there is a calculated risk in any activity, and we have to be smart and conscious - keeping clean, keeping our distance - but we cannot let fear triumph.

Spread courage instead

“Fear is contagious. Fortunately, so is courage. Learning to become fearless will touch everyone around you, and best of all, you'll find it's a gift that keeps on giving.” - Michelle Aguilar


Now I’m not recommending that you ignore government regulations by any means, but I am saying let’s notice the courage all around us, instead of focusing on the fear. 

We can act responsibly, and still live out our lives. 

Fear closes us off, courage opens our hearts. Let’s spread courage wherever we can. 

We will get through this.