No love without laughter?

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

Horace a popular lyric poet in Rome in the time of the emperor Augustus once said that, ‘Without love and laughter there is no joy.’ Is there love without laughter?

We are told that laughter is not the same as humour. Rather it is the physiological response to humour. Laughter relaxes us and enables us to trust our companions. Have you ever laughed with someone in a queue and felt more connected as a result? The more laughter there is, the more bonding occurs within a group.

We create connection with laughter.

We know so well after these days of lockdown, that connection is at the basis of all relationships. And relationships are all about loving others. But is loving just all about giving? Is it not also about receiving from another person? Without a doubt in loving someone we move beyond the circle of self to embrace an ‘other’ outside ourselves.

Some of my closest friends are those with whom I have shared many a good laugh. I think we would all agree laughter is an integral part of relationships.

Laughter - the great diffuser

Laughter helps diffuse tense situations or conflict that are an inevitable part of relating to others. It can throw a bit of relief over an otherwise intolerable, difficult or awkward situation.

And how often we have had the experience of taking ourselves just a little less seriously after we have laughed something off. A friend confided in me recently that her husband diffuses many a tense situation with, “So would the world end if X didn’t work out?”

Being able to laugh at ourselves is such a powerful weapon when it comes to issues in life that might just rob us of our peace, or feelings of harmony with the world around us.

But why do we laugh?

Laughter is all about interactions and engagement. When we laugh with people or even at people we want to relate better to them. We laugh to get a response from people.

Laughter Yoga

I was listening to a TED talk recently entitled ‘Laugh, Live, Love.’ A young woman was speaking about tough life experiences including a cancer diagnosis, no small feat.

She discovered Laughter Yoga and became a Certified Laughter Yoga Leader to help her deal with her cancer initially but then a whole gamut of life’s curveballs.

She found the whole experience liberating. Laughter Yoga is all about intentional laughter through specific movements and breathing exercises. Interestingly enough, the ego is left firmly outside the door, internal judgement is suspended, and instead the person is just asked to cultivate laughter right where you are and laugh for as long as you can. (Doesn’t it remind you of 10-year-olds laughing hysterically together at some bad childish joke!)

Not surprisingly, Laughter Yoga is used for different physical, psychological and spiritual problems. Still unconvinced? Laughter yoga therapy reduces stress, strengthens the immune system, increases energy levels, and improves the quality of life.

And it goes without saying - all of this impacts our relationships, and our capacity to give and receive love from another.

The power of laughter

While writing this blog post I was thinking that laughter does 3 things well. It creates joy, it possesses the power to heal and holds the power to connect us.

When you laugh you release endorphins or ‘happy’ hormones such as Dopamine, and Serotonin. These “happy hormones” in turn strengthen our relationships, making us more creative and better able to interact with other people.

All of this is linked with feelings of security and safety which allow a person to feel more relaxed. And as we all know a relaxed person with an improved mood and improved self-esteem can engage in more constructive and positive relationships which grow from strength to strength.

Laughter becomes the sun that drives winter away from the human face. Don’t wait until you are faced with a life or death situation to discover laughter. Learning how to laugh and share that laughter with others helps us become better human beings.

Laughter is the best medicine.

Love and laughter are two things that can help redeem this world. Wouldn’t we all agree that our woes and lives would be lightened if we could only learn how to laugh a bit more at ourselves, and learn how to love one another a bit better?

As Mother Teresa once said ‘Every time you smile at someone it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.’

So…Live every moment, Laugh every day, Love beyond words.