The power of forgiveness

Photo by Caleb George on Unsplash

Letting others be forgiven is letting ourselves “win”. It is a bizarre idea when you think about it. When we are offended, aggrieved, wronged we win when we do the forgiving.

We win when we become vulnerable and take the “hit” for someone else’s wrongdoing. When we crouch down on our spiritual hunkers and pretend. Pretend, as if we had not just suffered; a hurtful comment, a thoughtless action, an offensive deed.

It doesn’t sound very fair, does it?

But that is the Christian story of forgiveness.  That doesn’t sound very satisfying either. But the opposite position does not have the full truth on its side.

When we take things on face value, we take the attitude of “an eye for an eye or a tooth for a tooth”.  We don’t know the intention of the person who has “offended” us. Maybe they said the “hurtful” comment but meant to be direct and honest – not intending to hurt (as they saw it).  Perhaps the “thoughtless” action was merely a forgetful one. A moment of distraction or anxiety where their mind was absorbed by something else, nothing to do with us. So yet again they did not intend to hurt or offend. 

But does that mean we carry on indifferent to each other’s virtue or lack of it?

No. We simply don’t take things as we see them or interpret another’s intention. We step away, give the benefit of the doubt to the “offender”.

But even if they did intend all of the evil or badness of their act. We have the choice to take it for the team – for all of hurting humanity out there who maybe suffering more than you or I in a given moment.  

Why?

At that moment we are at one with Love itself

The greatest act of love - redemption.  

According to some historians it took place in human history on 14 Nisan, 3793 anno mundi—Friday, April 3, AD 33 at about 3 p.m., a few hours before the beginning of Passover day and the Sabbath. At that moment, Jesus Christ was killed. He was crucified on a wooden cross. Jesus was murdered by mankind. 

Certainly, it was God’s plan, but only because He chose to “win” by suffering for our sins. Why? So we could gain entry to heaven. We know we commit errors and most of us recognise evil when we see it.

We see how our wrong-doing hurts and damages ourselves and others; a resentment carried along for years, a habit of gossiping, a relationship that we have allowed to sour.

But healing is not self-ministered

Certainly, we receive some healing when we are forgiven by the person who has been hurt by our deed. 

Full Healing comes from the Person who has taken on the burden of our sin, Jesus on the Cross. He takes away the guilt.  He chose to suffer the full consequences of our sin. Spiritual healing can only come from God, a deep encounter with God.  

St Augustine explained it succinctly: “You accuse yourself: God excuses you. You excuse yourself: God accuses you.” Only God can forgive sins. He instituted the Sacrament of Mercy (cf. Jn 20:23) so that especially if we seriously offend Him we receive full, unconditional and certain forgiveness.

But forgiveness is not for later 

It is for me now as I am. 

We meet God as we are, not as we would like to be. It is not: Once I’ve gotten my act together, then I am worthy of forgiveness. We do not merit God’s love. We recognise it, which is also a grace.  It’s in the sickness itself where Jesus joins us. God goes out to meet the Prodigal Son. He does not wait for Him.

The Book of Lamentations in the Old Testament reminds us “His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning” (Lamentations 3:22-23). It is a reminder of God’s abundant mercy.

This Lent we can reach out to God in the Sacrament of Forgiveness:

• A good Examination of Conscience can help us navigate the sins forgotten or unspoken.

• The 3 Cs recommended by St Josemaría is a sure formula for our confession of our sins: clear, concise and complete.

• A good, experienced confessor will help us on our way.

It is hard to admit our mistakes in front of another person.  But in those moments a priest is Jesus for us. He is the Father in the Prodigal Son, the Good Samaritan.  The examples Jesus gives us in the Bible are prolific. And if we are still not convinced, there will be more rejoicing over our confession than over all the saints in heaven! 

So let’s let God “win”. 

Win our souls this Easter with a good confession.