This New Year, be authentically you
Oscar Wilde once said, “be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” It’s a call to really be the unique and unrepeatable person you are. There is something very compelling about authenticity and the choices we make say a lot about who we are.
How do I look at the world around me?
This question can also help us to consider who we really are. Do we look at the world as a consumer or as a contemplative? The philosopher Ivan Illich once said “In a consumer society there are inevitably two kinds of slaves: the prisoners of addiction and the prisoners of envy.”
We are all familiar with consumer envy. The thrill of the chase - the purchase - the possession. The Amazon parcels and gifts we received over Christmas will soon be forgotten as we head into the new year. And we will always want more!
While there is nothing wrong with retail therapy, if we are honest with ourselves we will realise that the thrill soon wears off with time. We don’t need to be reminded that many of our ecological problems today are due to over-consumption and unsustainable development – an unstoppable moreish approach. Things are not all that we are. But it can also consume our inner selves. Marilyn Monroe once said, “fame doesn’t fill you, it warms you a bit but that warmth is temporary.”
What’s your status?
There is something deeply insecure and scary about the fact that we have the potential to reduce ourselves to status; how we are perceived and how positive we feel about ourselves in a given moment. Image and status, however exhilarating, are not sustainable in themselves. Our sense of well-being cannot depend on something that gives immediate pleasure.
In contrast, there is an inner peace that comes from going deeper and finding peace from that which I do not need to possess or put in my wardrobe or upload to my Instagram account. It is something deeply personal.
This is the attitude of contemplation: a gentler, more holistic and respectful approach.
Learning to Contemplate
Contemplation comes from two words which mean together and temple. So when we contemplate, we try to experience something by being in some sense immersed in it and as such, hope to penetrate to the depths of something as it is. When we adopt a contemplative attitude, we manage to find the time to be with something – an idea, a presence in front of us, a person talking to us.
As we step into the New Year and we hear the familiar refrain of new resolutions, maybe we could look for a sense of renewal from a more contemplative attitude to life? Perhaps we will manage to choose a new direction, and take a more contemplative attitude to ourselves and the world we live in. We could leave the consumer to one side. Our actions change our perceptions and vice versa. We can change the way we look at things.
What does a contemplative attitude look like?
So what does contemplation look like on a day to day basis? When someone is talking to us, being in that conversation and not in the to-do-list that awaits us. In other words, being in and with the people we love. Not seeking something from them. Not seeking to possess them.
When we see something beautiful like a piece of art, a sunrise or sunset, to experience and be in the pleasure of that moment fully. When we are faced with a curve ball or a challenge, instead of reacting, blaming and trying to escape or avoid it, maybe asking ourselves “how can I grow into a better me, both in and through this situation?”
St Josemaría discovered at one stage a rich and interesting insight, “understand this well: there is something holy, something divine hidden in the most ordinary situations, and it is up to each one of you to discover it.”
A final thought: we were generated and born so we have not created ourselves. Perhaps our greatest sense of authenticity comes from exploring our origins from love to love. There is beauty in our sense of presence and existence. Let’s try and embrace the hidden and the beautiful in our realities and by doing so discover something richer this year.
